David & Brent
David worked from home for many years and recently got a shop in our local area which led to him having two empty rooms in his house. One day he was in a coffee shop and he overheard a customer telling the waitress that he was going on a firewalk which sounded appealing to David. As he was friends with the waitress, he asked her about it and she told him about a lady Jacqueline Munro who was organising it. Jacq was a friend of mine and knew that my lease on my flat was coming to an end soon and I was desperate to stay in the community I had become part of, yet there was nothing available, despite searching relentlessly.
Whilst talking to Jacq when David went to book the firewalk he mentioned he had just got a shop and was now living in a half empty house. She knew I was looking so suggested he rent out a room to me. He was sceptical having never lived with someone before but she quickly changed his mind by saying how “He’s a hardworking, very good-looking gay man that is studying Sign Language to help people in the community” and she thought we would get along great. He had also been reading a book about how you should say yes to things that scare you, so he agreed to exchange emails and we met one night to discuss the room but there was an instant attraction for both of us and we hit it off over a bottle of wine getting to know each other before deciding to become roommates.
We both tried to keep things platonic in the beginning, as not to risk ruining a lovely living situation. We stayed up night after night, getting to know each other, realising we had so much in common and were both geeks at heart! Every night we would wish that the sun wouldn’t rise, that we could stay in our little bubble and not worry about work or normal life that beckoned in the morning.
After about a month of this, we had a lovely Christmas together and then on new year’s eve David raised Mistletoe above my head and we had our first kiss. The next day we made our relationship official and went on our first date.
Our Engagement story
New Year’s Eve 2017
David: I went to a friend's party on the 30th December and stayed the night. On the way home on the 31st I picked up the engagement ring and hid it in a cupboard in the kitchen that we rarely used. But it was raining heavily and there was a huge leak in our dining room ceiling. Brent went into the cupboard where the ring was hiding in, to get a bowl for the leak, but did not notice the bag containing the ring. When I realised Brent was going into that cupboard I panicked and he couldn’t understand why. Later that evening over a lovely dinner I had a playlist of all our favourite songs. After dinner I had hung some mistletoe in the room and invited Brent for a kiss. I then produced a massive wooden box that he thought was a watch. I then got down on one knee and said “3 years ago, we kissed for the first time beneath this mistletoe- I haven’t stopped loving you from that moment- Will you Marry me? (Brent cried and said yes)
Our Wedding Day
Married Names: Brent De Castro and David De Castro
We had originally planned to have our wedding this year (2020) but David pushed for the ‘Why wait another year!’ rhetoric. We are so grateful we did, otherwise our wedding would
have been right in the middle of lockdown and cancelled! Which was also lucky because wedding insurance hadn’t even crossed our mind!
We realised we had both always dreamt of a June Wedding.
We travelled a lot in our motor home and our favourite place and happiest memories were in Aberfoyle. So we went to view Macdonald Forest Hills Hotel In June 2018. The wedding coordinator sat us by the feature windows, presented us with afternoon tea and the stunning views of Loch Ard and Ben Lomond in the disatance. We knew in that moment that this was the place we were going to be married and booked it then and there.
We chose to have an intimate Humanist wedding ceremony and inspired each other over many nights and many glasses of red wine. We are both very visual and artistic individuals and we effortlessly bounced ideas and dreams off of each other throughout the planning process. We are both thankful in the way we seem to easily compromise with each other.
It was actually our wedding invitations from ‘Gorgeous Invites’ that set off our inspiration and colour schemes. The invites where a sparkling midnight blue booklet rapped in a large gold satin bow.
We added many personalised items, made by family and friends a like e.g. our ‘quest book’ was actually an engraved wooden chest filled with wooden hearts for each guest to write a personalised
message and place back in the chest. We still even now, on a cold rainy day, open that wooden chest and read the messages on every heart, to cheer us up.
Our Isle runner also has the inscription ‘Friends Yesterday, Husbands Today, Soul Mates Forever, In general we wanted a non-traditional wedding, however, we did include e.g. the hand fasting, a reading of our favourite poem ‘The Invitation’ by Orah Mountain Dreamer, we lit a candle for the people that weren’t able to be will us.
Brent chose a best woman (Debbie) who did give Brent something Old, new, something borrowed and something blue.
We chose to walk down the aisle together, holding hands.
Our very close friend Heather Branigan who is a violinist, played a selection of Scottish songs as we walked down the aisle
We danced our first dance to Dolly Parton- The Story. This is ‘Our song’ and perfectly expresses how we feel about our
relationship and our past. Our time together hasn’t been a Disney fairy-tale-. You need to compromise, work as a team, hold the other person up when they need you to lean on, and ultimately inspire each other to do the best you can in every aspect of your lives.
The highlights of the day for us were:
Brent: The moment we said I do and I finally got to give David a huge kiss! Also there was a moment during my speech where I had to pause, overwhelmed with emotion, looking around at everyone’s faces, feeling so blessed to have everyone we loved and cared about in the same room at the same time!
David: My most emotional moment was our vows and then later in the evening my mum and dad telling me they had an amazing time and giving me a big hug. They still talk about it to this day and play our first wedding song regularly. This was a big deal as we are not the type of family that hug and say we love each other, even though we know it. As well as the fact they welcomed Brent into the family with loving arms and consider him a son. It meant so much to me.
Our photographer David Grant Simpson was incredible – was down to earth, took the time to get to know us, did his research, put us at ease. He was extremely pleasant and professional. He captured the candid moments but also made some of the photos seem dramatic and stylish. If you need a photographer - He’s your guy.
Our advice to brides/grooms-to-be that are about to start planning their day?
PLAN AHEAD. Have a wedding planning booklet. Have an excellent wedding coordinator if possible.
Ask for help- there may be something you haven’t even thought about that someone might mention. Ask someone who’s been through it all before. It can be doubly hard finding supplies that suit same sex couples- so remember that. TRY to make it an enjoyable planning experience, sit on the sofa,
have a glass of red and chat to each other.
Have a plan B for EVERYTHING. Take out wedding
Stick together on your wedding day! You’ll feel like a bit of a rag doll trying to talk to everyone, but remember the day is about the TWO OF YOU. Stick together – move around the room as a couple.